Bill's Bottom Feeder: The Perfect(?) Storm

It ain’t a fit night out for man or beast! One of my all time favorite WC Fields lines and sketches. Have you seen it? If not (and this link works) take seven seconds and look at it. Priceless I especially like the obvious pail full of “snow” part. And while not nearly as classy as WC (although we have the same first two initials!), here the Feeder is ready for Jonas (Keep reading)

But, before we get to the storm, it is part of my job to pass along a quick food entry (entrée?)

Friday, the day of Jonas’s arrival I attended a little meeting up at the Coffee Quarter in our nearby San Souci plaza. We have found that the CQ offers a relatively quiet and fairly private place for two and three people meetings. And, you can get coffee plus some other stuff if so inclined. So Friday morning we had a quick early (for me) meeting about some local civic association stuff, and I decided to have something to eat. So, I ordered a (hot) ham, cheese, and egg croissant sandwich. Before the change in ownership, I used to have this dish once in a while and it was kind of tasty. Well, things change.

I have to say that what I was given was among the worst sandwiches I have ever had (no, I didn’t send it back). And, i was so upset that I didn't even take a picture (believe it or no). The “ham” was a circular piece or maybe two circular pieces of ham like “lunch meat” folded in half and then again to make a quarter of a circle. That was tucked in about a third of the “croissant” perched atop a square of (?) cheese which was still cold and terribly NOT (sorry) “melty”; the yellowish homogeneous “egg” (which I didn't even want to know what was) was maybe what one could consider warm(ish). The “croissant” had been in the microwave so it got all squishy. I “deconstructed” the thing as much as possible, opening it and re positioning things which still resulted in a terribly unsatisfying thing. I have had better offerings there later in the day, the Hummus is nice, their “deli” sandwiches can be good (Reuben) but this was awful. Trying to beat the flakes, so as I said I did not send it back. I should have or at least complained.

Anyway, that started the storm day off on a low note.

Okay cue the Storm:

I have been wracking (racking?) what’s left of my brain to come up with a catchy rhyme for “Jonas”. “Jonas, look what you did tous!!” Seems like it should be easy, but I struggled. Anyway, he certainly dumped on us.. (Hey!!! “Jonas, you dumped onus!”). All the weather pundits (even my trusty weather hero, Justin Burke) were telling us that this storm would be the “worst ever; epic; historic” and so on. Predictions were accompanied by inscrutable (but colorful) maps (with circles and arrows – Arlo Guthrie) of isobars, wind shears, upper and lower atmospheric convection contours, waves, potential tracks, and so on. Networks went nuts as usual, dispatching reporters on all sorts of street corners, riding in monster vehicles, and so on. And you know what? (well, you probably do), for the most part they were pretty much spot on. When all was said and done, depending on your location (here in SOMD) you got anywhere from 9 to 2X inches of snow. Up in the metropolis of DC, totals went into the thirties. Historic.

Emotional reaction

I know I am a curmudgeon, and a general aging fuddy duddy, but when the word (substantial) “snow” creeps into the forecast, I start thinking about provisions and plans: do we need cash? Who will “do” the driveway, what is the state of the furnace?, and things like that. My nervousness quotient is somewhat lower now that we have our mighty Generac (which we never hope to use), but then that translates to “do we have enough propane?”, stuff like that. So, it always takes me aback when Facebook (yes, I admit it) lights up with people declaring “C’mon Snow!; About time!; Bring it on!” and other phrases like that. What are they thinking? Are they romantics with misty eyed visions of children building snow men in Grandma Moses landscapes; sledding and tobogganing, ice skating on frozen ponds, gathering around a bonfire slurping hot chocolate. Does that really exist? Well, fine for them, I may have been young once. Deep down I suppose I admire that attitude, but somehow I just can’t bring myself to that side.

Anyway Friday noon, the flakes started falling, and really never ceased until sometime in the night on Sunday, with howling winds most of the time. Mercifully the Generac was never forced into use (thank you again SMECO and contractors for whatever you did), and we hunkered just fine. We of course suffered eating healthy foods and remained well hydrated.

My only leaving the house was in the Nanook (he went to Michigan State, you know) costume above to try to get to the bird feeders, which failed when knee deep snow prevented further progress.

Sunday dawned bright and sunny revealing Jonas’s handiwork in the back yard

And in our "utility area" containing our life support systems.

And I won’t harp on it much, since I do it every year, and nothing happens.... But the erstwhile (and I’m sure well meaning) county road folks dedicate themselves to opening the roads for (I presume) the “people”. So out they go into the storm blades shoving snow away from the roads and….. across your driveway. We who live on a circle always have an impenetrable wall of snow all pushed “away” from the circle to make getting out of the driveway virtually impossible. I guess we are not "people", only taxpayers! Apparently going around clockwise pushing stuff TO the middle, is “Just something we don’t do”. Thank you so, so, so, much

Fortunately we have some caring friends who show up to help us. As we age, we’re more and more dependent on their good aid.